Rushing Towards The Pain

“What if I rushed towards the pain of the world instead of turning away from it?” 

Glennon Doyle Melton

Recently another heartbreaking image and news story flashed across the screens of millions. 

I will be honest. Rather than click the link to watch the full video or view the image gallery, I chose to ignore it. I didn’t want the negativity. I felt as though there was already too much to deal with in my life as it was.

You know what? 

I was wrong.

As Glennon Doyle Melton says in a beautifully written blog post,

“…let us not say: I can’t look at this. It’s just too much. That is not true. It is not too much for us. It is too much to be them, but it is not too much to look at them. Please look and remember that if that was our little girl (and it is) we would want good-hearted people to draw close and help - not to look away. We will not look away. We will not protect our own hearts: we will work to protect our human family.”

I was wrong to quickly scroll past the image and hope that I didn’t see anymore. I was wrong to ignore the plight of another human being. To choose not to feel.

I know why I quickly scanned past the story. I was afraid of my reaction. I knew what it was going to be. 

Without a fault, every time I see an image of a child in pain, injured, in tears, separated from their families, alone or with that numb look on their faces that they have seen and experienced far more than anyone ever should, my heart breaks. I break down. Tears run down my face as I sit in the comfort of my home with the feeling of helplessness lingering on into the day.

What can I, a young woman in Southern California, thousands of miles from the crisis really do? What difference will giving a small amount of money really make? How can I reach out and comfort those children whose tears flash across our newsfeeds?

I feel helpless. I really do. And I think a lot of other people can relate.

So today when I clicked to listen to Glennon’s interview on MarieTV I was shocked to hear her talk about hitting rock bottom and running into our pain headfirst. That pain and heartbreak is part of the beauty of living. That it is something to both lean into, process and run towards - rather than away from. And then to top it off she spoke of The Compassion Collective that focuses specifically on the plight of refugee children and homeless youth in the US. It was as if she were speaking directly to my heart. And then she said this,

“What if heartbreak, what breaks my heart, is not something to be numbed or avoided. What if what breaks my heart is a message to me, is a wake up, a shining arrow that is pointing me directly towards my purpose?”

And I broke.

In the moment after she spoke those words, I broke. The tears returned and I just knew. I just knew I had to do something. So I started writing. I may not know exactly how to tackle this challenge but I do know that I enjoy writing and I have this platform. So I am using it. I am using it today. I am using it to reach out to you - friends and family as well as others I do not know. Because all I know, all I understand as of this moment, is that I have found my heartbreak and I must do something. 

So I’ve challenged myself, what if I do choose to rush towards the pain of the world, rather than run away? What change can I truly make? What will happen?

At this point it is hard to know, but I am willing to heed the call and start. So here it is. Here is the first step. And at this moment, at least I know I’m doing something. I’m heartbroken yes, but I no longer feel helpless and that is a vast improvement in itself.

So join me.

Choose to find your heartbreak. To allow yourself to turn towards the things that break your heart. Choose to feel the pain and share with others. To not be afraid to talk about it. To process it. To pray about it. To use your gifts, whatever they may be, to tackle it in the ways only you can. Because you matter. They matter. The world matters. And it is only when each of us steps into our purpose and heartbreak that the world will change for the better.

So choose pain. Choose joy. And choose action.

Taking Action

I did something scary this weekend.

Something I’ve been mulling over for at least a few weeks.

Something I thought I couldn’t find enough time to actually make happen. When in reality I was procrastinating and doing unimportant tasks that filled up the hours and made it APPEAR as though I had run out of time.

So yesterday, after a long conversation with a good friend and fellow entrepreneur, I finally did it.

I had already spent two hours scrolling through meaningless social media when I told myself that that was enough. I had to make a move.

So I did.

And in doing so, I felt a mix of both freedom and elation and the weightiness of FEAR.

The thoughts of doubt. The thoughts saying that I couldn’t do it. That it wouldn’t work. That I would be a complete and utter failure. They were all there.

And I’m still struggling with them.

Do I know what I’m doing? No.

Will this be a steep learning curve? Yes.

Will I make mistakes? Yes.

Can it fail? Quite possibly.

But will I be happy I tried? Yes. 

Will I regret taking action? Ultimately, no matter happens, no.

So in the end its worth it.

And in a way I launched this community as much for myself as for others.

So what is it?

Well first let me explain one thing. I rebranded my website under The Rested Entrepreneur. That was the original goal of starting a website and it finally felt like it was time to shift everything over. My website is still under my own name, but the primary domain has changed. As well as the layout.

And…

I launched a community. On Facebook.

I decided that in order to provide value and learn more about what other entrepreneurs needed in order to feel balance in their lives - that I should launch a closed group - or a community - for those looking for the same thing.

And don’t get me wrong, I am in no means the shining example of this. In fact, I am often the opposite. 

Struggling with energy, self-doubt, depression, overwhelm...all of it (cue the negative self talk here).

But one thing I do know is that I am tired of seeing friends working to the point of burnout. Tired of the endless lists of productivity hacks. Of sleep hacks. Of ways to squeeze more activity into your day. Of quotes that are supposedly motivating, but instead create unnecessary levels of guilt about how much YOU got done today. 

I’m tired of the productivity narrative telling us to wake up early, take care of your body, run a business, have a family and look perfect the whole time and repeat the next day - and saying its easy with these ”easy to implement steps”. It’s not. It’s not natural. And I would argue that it is far more likely people burn out rather than ever make it to success with this game plan.

So I did it. 

I created the Facebook community under the same name as my website, The Rested Entrepreneur.

At this point in time I have no idea where it will lead me, but I do know one thing - it is something I needed to do. So I did. 

And the value of action often far outweighs anything else.

So if you would like to join, just send me a request over Facebook and I will be sure to include you in this experiment called community.

My hope is that it takes a life of its own. But we will see. 

And that’s part of the excitement.